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my inner critic carries a megaphone.

September 28, 2011 /

My inner critic woke up early this morning, grabbed a megaphone, and launched into an unrelenting rant…

The minute that I woke up – "It's 5:30…time to get up. Awwww, you're tired? Guess you shouldn't have stayed up so late working last night. Why DID you stay up so late working? Do you really think that your effort is going to make a difference? I think not! T probaby laughs at the fact that you think you're helping."

While taking a shower - "Are your thighs rubbing together? Fat *ss! Funny how you talk a good game about being healthy & going to the gym, but you're still chubby. Those yoga pants are going to look just lovely on those thighs."

While getting ready – "OMG. Awful hair day much? Right, like that ponytail helps. Do you really think that long hair is appropriate for a 40 year old?"

While making breakfast - "Need to buy eggs. Maybe you should buy organic instead of selling out & buying them at Costco. Cutting corners on Austin's health. Niiiiice. He's going to look back on his childhood and remember that his Mom didn't even bother to buy him organic eggs. You are clearly ruining his life. His childhood sucks."

While checking FB & email – "Excited about Chicago? That's great. Remember when you invited all those friends to meet you & Barb in CA and everyone bailed? Why bother inviting anyone to Chicago? No one will show up, and Barb will just think that you're a loser."

While thinking of writing this blog post – "Do you really think that anyone reads your blog any more? Booooring."

While looking at the forecast of rain for Sat – "Why shouldn't it rain on your photo walk? You probably shouldn't have even volunteered to do it. Everyone else will probably have sunshine, rainbows, and freakin' magnetic-whatever auras from the satellite crash. You suck."

And so on & so forth. Seriously. I spent most of the morning saying (out loud, to myself) "it's okay Katrina. calm down." I turned the music up in the car extra loud to drown out that inner critic voice. Remember how Ally McBeal had a theme song that would play in her head (and for the viewers)? Today, I'm trying to drown out my inner critic with a theme song of my own. Christina Aguilera's Soar (I was going to upload a video, but can't find an official clip, so you're on your own). I'm also telling my inner critic to F off. So there.

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